


don't quite know what im trying to say

by snowandfire



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Childhood Friends, First Kiss, Fluff, Idiot to Idiot Communication, Light Angst, M/M, Misunderstandings, They're In Love Your Honor, and write a whole ass fic, because its zuko, in which i receive an ask on tumblr, strap in you know the deal, they're idiots your honor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-20
Updated: 2020-09-20
Packaged: 2021-03-08 01:40:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,536
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26557525
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/snowandfire/pseuds/snowandfire
Summary: [Zuko didn’t know how to ask for a kiss now. Whether he should just lean forward and do it. If what he thought Sokka meant was what Sokka meant. Whether he should wait for Sokka to kiss him. He was a ball of energy and he wanted to. He wanted to, he just didn’t know. If it was anyone else in front of him, if it was about anyone else, he would have asked Sokka for advice. Reluctantly of course, and after much poking and prodding on Sokka’s part.But what do you do when you’re confused...And your best friend is the one that you’re confused about? Fuck.OR:zuko's liked sokka since kindergarten. but when their first kiss happens on accident he has to say he doesn't mean it.]
Relationships: Sokka/Zuko (Avatar)
Comments: 37
Kudos: 468





	don't quite know what im trying to say

**Author's Note:**

> received this anonymous ask on tumblr about zukka first kiss: "Prompt: this is REALLY basic but how about they're sitting together and one of them drops something and both of them lean over to pick it up and accidental kiss,,, and both of them are idiots so they're like "sorry i didn't mean that" until one of them (i'll leave you to decide who) thinks. enough. and pulls the other in and kisses them"
> 
> and this happened, enjoy  
> i can be found on tumblr at @bluberry-spicehead

Zuko’s liked him _forever_ . Since kindergarten when Sokka found him sitting in the corner stacking blocks, alone. All ‘hey can i play too?’ and ‘hey, im Sokka,’ with a big cheesy grin. They had made up a game about dragons and magic and it had been fun. _I get to be the dragon king! No, I do!_ Zuko’s dragon was named _Druk._ Sokka’s was named _Wang Fire._ Of all things. 

By the first grade Zuko liked him even more. He didn’t like meals at home, they were formal, and strict. His dad got upset about everything from his chopsticks form, to the way he tucked in his shirt. But Sokka ate without apprehension and he made Zuko feel comfortable just by association. Zuko liked the way Sokka went on and on about his dad, Hakoda, and how great he was. About his sister, and how annoying _she_ was (he could relate). He liked how natural it felt. The warmth in Sokka’s voice and his laugh. He wanted to stick close to it. 

He liked that Sokka didn’t mind it. The way Zuko followed him around. At recess. In class. Always looking at him, when the teacher asked the kids to partner up. Sokka seemed to enjoy it, the single-minded attention and appreciation Zuko gave him. Eyes wide, listening to every word. It was as if Sokka had never been cared for that way before. The way he practically glowed when Zuko laughed at his jokes. _Weird._

Second grade was the year they got married (with paper rings of course). It was mostly a joke. For the sake of being ‘best friends forever'. The vows had been simple. _We’ll always be buds, okay? Okay._

Zuko’s mom had just left, and Sokka’s had just, well...let’s just say they both liked the idea of forever. Zuko kept his ring for years. He wasn’t sure if Sokka still had his. Zuko liked that Sokka had never broken his promise. He liked that Sokka was one part of his life that his dad had never touched and never would. 

  
  


He didn’t like to think about it, but Zuko liked him during the bad times too. The years when Zuko barely spoke to him, driving himself insane trying to get grades and scores and awards to impress his dad. Whatever it took. Whatever it took. Including cutting Sokka out. It had hurt, but Zuko had done it. And somehow, after everything, Sokka had still come to Iroh’s house in the days after. His voice was all quiet, and sort of hoarse. _I’m your best friend, why wouldn’t I come?_ It had taken a while, but they had built themselves back up. Slowly, but surely. Zuko liked that about him too. Sokka forgave him. Sokka didn’t quit. The fact that Sokka came everyday bearing homework, and papers from school. The fact that Sokka’s sense of humor hadn’t changed, and though there was softness about him, he never tiptoed around Zuko the way some people did now. The fact that Sokka had been there the day the bandages came off and wouldn’t flinch. 

He liked him _so_ much. He always had. But it had been a different kind of liking. That was the kind of liking that was warm, like a hug or a handshake, or the soft crunch of fall leaves. The sound of quiet piano music and of falling water. That was still there. But there was something else at work now. Something only the mind of someone fifteen and hopelessly confused could possibly come up with. A crazy sort of rush whenever Sokka came by. A tell tale blush whenever Sokka said something nice. Absolute incoherence whenever Sokka said something nice _about him_. It was a nightmare. A thundercloud of emotion. Problematic to say the least. 

The reason Sokka came over on the fateful day was to watch _The Dragon Prince._ It was a regular thing. Wednesday nights. Homework, then watching something. Uncle had a really old TV in his living room, but Sokka brought over his laptop to preserve both of their sanities. Zuko was four months, two days, and probably a matter of hours into his ‘problem of a new kind of liking'. Somewhat worse for wear. Sweating like a madman, and having changed his shirt like four times by the time the doorbell rang. _No matter what color the shirt is he can still see your face_. 

Sokka had come bearing tacos, because of course he had. He sat right next to Zuko on the sofa. He chewed the end of his pencil, right at the eraser nub, as he worked on geometry homework. Zuko got maybe one problem done every hour. His brain doing a little loop of: _Sokka’s eyes, Sokka’s hair, Sokka’s mouth._

Then Sokka dropped his pencil. It landed, somehow, on the table, on the other side of Zuko. Sokka reached for it. But somehow, something in Zuko’s brain saw Sokka leaning towards him a moment before it registered what Sokka was actually doing. It thought. It actually thought the moment was on. That this was for him. That Sokka wanted this. 

Zuko kissed him. He turned Sokka’s face towards him and he kissed him. Just a soft press of his lips against Sokka’s. Warm and short. And then he realized. _The pencil. He was reaching for the pencil. Not for me._

“I didn’t mean it,” he said quickly. And he couldn’t look Sokka in the eyes. 

“Do you remember Druk?” Sokka asked. 

“What?” 

“It’s okay if you forgot, we were like five or six. The make believe dragon game we used to...Anyway that’s not what I was. Um, god I don’t know how to talk about shit like this. But you know you’re the only person that really likes my jokes. And you stayed friends with me even after I squirted milk out of my nose at the lunch table.” 

Sokka paused for a second. “Then you stopped talking to me, and I didn’t know what happened. Until I did. I always liked you, Zuko. And lately, uhhh, well I tried on like four different shirts before I came over here. For you. I liked you then, like a lot, but lately I’ve liked you in a more, um, so what you just did, you said you didn't mean it, but what if I did. What if I wanted to and I was just scared you wouldn't want, well, me...” 

“People should like your jokes,” Zuko repeated, rather stupidly, as his brain ground to a halt. “They’re funny. They’re good jokes.” 

“I know right!” Sokka laughed a little nervously. 

Zuko didn’t know how to ask for a kiss now. Whether he should just lean forward and do it. If what he thought Sokka meant was what Sokka meant. Whether he should wait for Sokka to kiss him. He was a ball of energy and he wanted to. He wanted to, he just didn’t know. If it was anyone else in front of him, if it was about anyone else, he would have asked Sokka for advice. Reluctantly of course, and after much poking and prodding on Sokka’s part. 

But what do you do when you’re confused...And your best friend _is_ the one that you’re confused about? _Fuck._

“I don’t know what to do either, ya know,” Sokka offered, practically reading his mind, “but if you want...you can kiss me, and we can figure it out together.” 

That’s all the encouragement that he needed. He took hold of Sokka’s warm cheek in his right hand. And he kissed the corner of his mouth. He pressed his closed mouth to Sokka’s then opened it as Sokka did. Sokka smiled into the kiss. He tasted like taco. And Zuko turned his head to kiss deeper before taking the top of a lip in his. Sokka sighed, and his hands found Zuko’s waist. Binders fell to the floor with a clunk as he leaned into Zuko. Zuko kissed him again. Again for all the time he couldn’t talk to Sokka because his dad said no. Again for all the things he said when he had to drive Sokka away. Again for the way Sokka looked at him when he put a paper ring on his finger in the second grade. Again for all the things he still wasn’t able to say. Kiss. Kiss. Soft. Warm. Kiss. Again. And again. _For Sokka._

He pulled back to breathe, heart still racing. The way Sokka was still looking at him. Brown eyes holding all the care in all the world. It was dizzying. His heart was throbbing in his chest. He felt a dam inside break, a valve click open. 

Zuko swallowed, and his voice was hoarse, “I meant it. I meant it all.” 

  
Sokka didn’t answer with words. But with another kiss. Another caress. The way he pulled Zuko into his arms easily. The way he made Zuko feel like it was alright. Like it would always be alright. The way he always had. Zuko knew. He knew it in his soul. And he knew it in his mind and his heart. And across every inch of his skin. With every touch. _Sokka meant it too._

**Author's Note:**

> as always thank you to abby for beta, ily


End file.
